I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
