just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Randomize