how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
smell my finger.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
