she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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