there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Randomize