Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize
