If i come over, it means nothing
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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