yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
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