There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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