someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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