If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
worst night to have a conscience
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize