I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize