id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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