His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
