i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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