dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Randomize
