my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
