my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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