Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
