so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
