so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
