so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Did we literally take a cab across the street
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
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