is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
