Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I just googled if crying burns calories
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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