is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize