just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
