Got a toothbrush?
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
