I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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