; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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