I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
