So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize