How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
