What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
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Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
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This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
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