Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
His nipple licking is glorious
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