Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
foreskin is a definite game changer
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
