Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize