So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
