But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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