Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
