I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Randomize
