I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
