and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
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Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
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I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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