Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
