I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
