great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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