They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize