He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...