I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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