i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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