So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
If that was your dad, he is hot
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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